against the grain.

I have been shaken from a haze of which I barely knew I lived.
I have been lifted from wet soil and shown a light I can barely believe I hid from.
I have been awakened by tragedy.
I hold onto a string of hope so delicate it may be broken by the mere need of it.

My heart reaches to be seen.
To wrap itself around others who can barely speak.
I am driven by the finite knowing.
I am broken by the words.

I am whole because I am here.
Because I can move these hands.
Because I can type this thought.

But I am still searching.

I have a need for answer.
But it's something I can't hand to you.

And it all wraps around me.
It breathes into me and I hold it there.
I hope it there.
I feel it there.
I fall to my knees. 

and I shatter because I cannot rescue you.